This might get a little bit complicated.
Using the time honoured tradition of numbering my offspring by age I have always referred, on this blog and in day-to-day life, to my 11 year old first born as No1 son (a small tip of the hat to Charlie Chan too) and, logically, to my 3 year old as No2. It's merely a question of chronology and both are loved equally although when alone with either of them I always explain that I prefer their company to that of their sibling. This, I believe, constitutes good parenting.
Now, No2 son has done very well learning his number, both spoken and signed, and with a view to encouraging this I explained to him my naming convention. 'You're No2 son,' I told him.
This provoked an immediate response. 'No,' he said and signed, 'I'm number one, me.' I went on to detail that since he was little and his brother was larger and older it made sense that he was No2. 'No,' he told me quite definitely. 'I'm number one, me.'
In the hope of finding some sort of accord I turned to No1 son and asked him if, being an older and wiser head, he wouldn't mind abdicating the top spot. 'Er, no,' was his position on that.
'Sorry,' I signed to No2 son, 'you're number 2.'
'No. I'm number one, me.'
No1, as always more interested in fanning rather than dousing the flames, questioned his brother.
'What number's daddy?'
No2 son paused for thought. He made an exaggerated 'hmm' sound and then delivered his verdict.
'Five.'
Cue much laughter from No1 son. Pursuing his theme: 'And mummy?'
Again, this did not receive an immediate answer. Another thoughtful 'hmm' and then: 'Six'.
That's not fair! That's Patrick McGoohan's number in The Prisoner! (Of course it's my Fifteenth Telly Recommendation. How could it not be?) How come she gets a cool number?
(And talking of cool stuff, while I was looking for a picture to illustrate my appreciation of The Prisoner I came across this:
Yes! Jack Kirby did a Prisoner comic! It was for Marvel but was never published - this site has the details. I'll say that again - Jack Kirby did a Prisoner comic!)
Anywhere, where was I? Oh yes. No1 son was intrigued by the seemingly arbitrary assigning of numbers as was I. So we asked No2 'Who is number three?'
'Hmm,' declared the sage, thinking hard. 'I don't know.'
More soonliest.
Pah numbers! I use one name for both. All I have to do is shout 'morons' and I will hear a little 'yes' from one or both of the lads.
ReplyDeleteMy daughter was assigned a number (there are some characters in there too, so alphanumeric identifier to all you pedants out there) by the 'Government'. They sent her a plastic card with it embossed on it, last year. It's too long to refer to her by, she's yet to memorise it herself, so we stick to the name we gave her.
At least they got her gender correct, mine was sent all those years ago, with the title 'Miss', the ignominy! My parents found that quite funny for some odd reason.