The air is close and heavy but the storm is refusing to come and clear it up. It's always this way when the flow of time gets bunged up. The ozone created by lightning works as an excellent spatio-temporal decongestant.
But for now...
The American Pop Cultural Attaché (APCA) is visiting Scarborough, only her train was delayed and she missed her connection. As a result, reality split into two (y'know, like in Sliding Doors (fact: Gwyneth Paltrow still uses the accent Joey from Bread gave her when she did the film when she talks to husband Coldplay's Chris Martin. He still doesn't realise she's American!) while the good attaché had a cuppa and got here an hour late, her evil goateed counterpart arrived on time and started zapping holidaymakers with her phaser. I hate it when that happens.
Various bits of time slippage meant the next train to depart was hauled by Scots Guardsman, a steam loco that went missing in the mists of time 25 years ago. It was driven by Blythe Danner, pretending to be an older version of her daughter, Gwyneth Paltrow, by putting on an English accent! With a goatee!
But perhaps the weirdest side effect of this is that in 2 seperate parallel universes both myself and the APCA starting going on about Gwyneth Paltrow and Sliding Doors on my blog and her Twitter feed at EXACTLY THE SAME TIME.Other related phenomena included a double rainbow over Scarborough and forgetting to set the timer for Torchwood and The Big Bang Theory. There's also the fact that this blog is being sent back in time from the following morning. Weird, eh? Almost like some mysterious force caused me to nod off.
Let's hope its not long until the normal flow of time is resumed.
More soonliest. Or the nearest non linear temporal equivalent.
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