You Smell of Blue

The Twenty-Ninth of November Two Thousand and Twelve. Thursday.

People often ask me, 'Vin, how do you smell so lovely?'*

It's simple really. Let me take you on a short journey into the world of the gender politics of toiletries.

Being a man I always make sure I wash with blue soap.

If I ever decide to have a shower, I keep all my masculinity locked in with the fresh scent of blue shower gel.

And when my beard gets the better of me, I attack it with blue shaving foam.

But here's the trick.To ensure that I smell as fresh as a woman I cast aside convention and use pink deodorant!

(Hey everyone. Real Vin here. Obviously I'm making a pin-sharp satirical point here about the marketing of cheap cosmetics to pound shop hounds like me. But I'd hate for any of you to think I really use pink deodorant. No, I use sensible, unambiguous, gender-neutral red deodorant, me).

More soonliest.


*86% of nearly 122 men asked.